Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Quotes and Anecdotes from MBtGE

My Buddy the Gun Enthusiast sent me some quotes in a "forwarded email" kind of way. You know, like those annoying chain-letter emails your mother-in-law sends that want you to forward to a mess of friends and Bill Gates will donate a dollar to cancer research if you do, and the message is all sappy and stuff. This one is different. First: It's not sappy. Second: I actually LIKE the quotes, so I repost them here.
  1. John Steinbeck once said: "Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you."

  2. If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.

  3. I carry a gun cause a cop is too heavy.

  4. When seconds count, the cops are just minutes away.

  5. A reporter did a human-interest piece on the Texas Rangers. The reporter recognized the Colt Model 1911 the Ranger was carrying and asked him "Why do you carry a 45?" The Ranger responded, "Because they don't make a 46."

  6. An armed man will kill an unarmed man with monotonous regularity.

  7. The old sheriff was attending an awards dinner when a lady commented on his wearing his sidearm. "Sheriff, I see you have your pistol. Are you expecting trouble?" "No Ma'am. If I were expecting trouble, I would have brought my rifle."

  8. Beware the man who only has one gun. HE PROBABLY KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!!

  9. I was once asked by a lady visiting if I had a gun in the house. I said I did. She said "Well I certainly hope it isn't loaded!" To which I said, of course it is loaded, can't work without bullets!" She then asked, "Are you that afraid of some one evil coming into your house?" My reply was, "No not at all. I am not afraid of the house catching fire either, but I have fire extinguishers around, and they are all loaded too." To which I'll add, having a gun in the house that isn't loaded is like having a car in the garage without gas in the tank.

1 comment:

I reserve the right to delete patently offensive comments. Or, really, any comment I feel like. Or I might leave a really juicy comment up for private ridicule. Also spammers.

You can always offend hippies in the comment section. Chances are, those will be held up as a proper example...