Thursday, July 10, 2008

meme, A to Z

Saw this meme a few places. The last was Breda's place, and I need blog fodder.

Accent: Wakes up the flavor in food
Breakfast or no breakfast: Coffee, 3 Egg Cheese Omelet, Rye Toast buttered, Side of Scrapple, Orange juice, pulpless. Silence.

Dog or Cat: Cat if forced to choose a critter that doesn't know how to operate a flush terlet.
Essential Electronics: I have a fully functional 1:87 scale
ENIAC in my basement.
Favorite Cologne: My scent is the reek of camels and aqua velva and my own personal manly musk. Occasionally a whiff of methane. You'll find no Frenchified perfumes in my terlet area.
Gold or Silver: I'd say silver but that's a little fancy-shmancy, poop don't stink, idn't it? We're more pewter people, we are.
Handbag I carry most often: ???!!!
Insomnia: Never.
Job Title: I'm a Cleaner. I solve problems.
Kids: The goat kind?
Living Arrangements: Alone, in a perfect brick home 1 mile from the first house I ever lived in.
Naughtiest Childhood Behavior: It's ok to kill a sleeping hobo with a hammer, right? I mean, it's not like they are real people or anything.
Overnight hospital stays: Many. Wait. OVERnight? Just the one as a kid for the tonsils.
Phobias: Mauled by bears
Quote: "Everything in moderation except Love and Justice." --JB Miller
Siblings: Brother
Unusual Talent or Skill: I can, at will, stand on one leg and get the other one almost behind my head. People are shocked that a guy like me, as big and dumpy as me, can just casually DO that.
Vegetable I Refuse to Eat: Beets. Check that. ALL vegetables. Vegetables are what FOOD eats. Red, juicy meat is not bad for you. (Now, green, fuzzy meat... THAT's bad for you.)
Worst Habit: Procrastinating.
X-rays: Broken sesamoid bone in my foot, multiple chest xrays, radius and ulna hairline, the attempt to sever my thumb with a 100 year old handsaw. (unsuccessful)

Yummy Stuff: Fresh hoppy refreshing golden citrusy IPAs
Zoo Animal I Like Most: When I was a kid it was the Siberian Tigers at the National Zoo. Nowadays? Dunno. No monkey.






UPDATE, forgot some:



Chore I don’t care for: Yard work of any type

Most Admirable Trait: My incredible, awe-inspiring modesty

Reason to smile: Because your hide will make a fine poncho


Time I wake up: 5:30, 5:39, 5:48, and 5:57.


And READ http://www.basicinstructions.net/. Finest comic by a guy that looks like me, but isn't me.

4 comments:

  1. Best answers EVER. You so funny. =)

    but you forgot about your zombie phobia (necrophobe?)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Why'd you skip C, M, R, and T?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am notorious for saying "Just one more snooze..."

    Damn alarm clock

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh my God, that does look like you.

    ReplyDelete

I reserve the right to delete patently offensive comments. Or, really, any comment I feel like. Or I might leave a really juicy comment up for private ridicule. Also spammers.

You can always offend hippies in the comment section. Chances are, those will be held up as a proper example...