Well, I just did my taxes. I’m getting $300 LESS back this year compared to last. So my taxes have ALREADY gone up. Those bastards downtown done stole my money!
And some of YOU readers voted for him. The way I see it, you owe me for that $300. Now I know that many of you don’t have that kind of scratch on you. No worries. Let me tell you about my Ass Gas or Grass policy….
See, either you mow my lawn for the summer… that’s the grass part, or you pay my winter gas bill, or I get to shoot you in the hind quarters with my dad’s old BB gun.
Anyway, enough to buy a new gun? Maybe. Maybe not. I need to go visit my mom down in the FLA.
More topicality…
We’re expecting another doozy of a winter storm down here. The weather people have set the White-Death Death-Count Counter back to zero in anticipation of tracking the mortality from Donner Party type privations and suburban avalanches. Or something. How is that related to guns? I’ll tell you. We’re all friends here, all gun enthusiasts… How to solve the blizzard problem with guns? No, I’m not talking about exacting our revenge on meteorological phenomena by shooting our guns in the air, Iraqi Wedding style, or using them to stick up our neighbors to rob them of the pre-requisite blizzard milk bread eggs and terlet paper. Neither of those methods are wise or safe. No, I’m talking about using our firearms to clear the snow after! (and PERFECTLY safe!)
Load your 12 gauge with rock-salt and SHOOT the snow. The salt will melt the snow! What could go wrong?
Or use some of those Dragon's Breath rounds...
ReplyDeleteI haven't done my taxes yet, but I suspect I'll be writing checks to Feds and the State of DE again.
ReplyDeleteJust thinking about it makes me want to drink.
Don't forget that they upped the numbers in the withholding tables last year, so even if you got the same amount back you still would have paid more in. If you got back even less well, that means that you, uh, well, you know....
ReplyDeleteI love the smell of change in the morning.