Monday, June 28, 2010

Top 10 meme

From JayG, but he got it from on down the line.

"Tell me your ten best reasons life is good... I issue it as a challenge."

  1. No one is shooting at me, RIGHT NOW. And few are trying to kill me by other means.
  2. I have access to AC and 21st Century Dentistry. Heck, I’ll settle for mid 20th Century dentistry.
  3. The incredible self control I have to refrain from killing other people with my bear hands. (There’s a tip for the 2nd Admendment enthusiast. If you ever DO snap and go on a killing spree, don’t use a gun. It’ll just help our political enemies. I’d like to see what the Brady’s will say when Sumdood kills 9 people using a feather duster as a bludgeon while a Sig 229 sits unused in his IWB holster, 12 + 12 rounds of loaded magazines. Explain THAT, VPC! (Seriously, don’t go on a killing spree.))
  4. Speed Cameras that people over compensate for, slowing down to 30mph in a 55 zone to avoid a ticket. Wonderful. Those blood vessels in my eyes and brain need pressure testing and now I don’t have to worry about that.
  5. Mosquitos. Yeah, more of them. Add poison ivy to that category.
  6. Intoxicating beverages, fatty foods, and strumpets-for-money are cheap and plentiful.
  7. The job I do to make my money to feed, clothe, and shelter myself doesn’t involve stoop labor in a flooded paddy.
  8. I forget what 8 was for.
  9. Sporting events in this country have yet to truly discover the vuvuzela. (Actually I just like saying and typing vuvuzela.)
  10. My government isn’t too afraid of its citizens… but it is a LITTLE bit. Much better compared to many other nations.

2 comments:

Arthur said...

"I have to refrain from killing other people with my bear hands"

If that's some sort of genetic aberration you're sporting, I think I know why you sometimes have problems with your pistol shooting.

New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

Don't read TOO much into the joke-posts, Arthur