Monday, June 28, 2010

Top 10 meme

From JayG, but he got it from on down the line.

"Tell me your ten best reasons life is good... I issue it as a challenge."

  1. No one is shooting at me, RIGHT NOW. And few are trying to kill me by other means.
  2. I have access to AC and 21st Century Dentistry. Heck, I’ll settle for mid 20th Century dentistry.
  3. The incredible self control I have to refrain from killing other people with my bear hands. (There’s a tip for the 2nd Admendment enthusiast. If you ever DO snap and go on a killing spree, don’t use a gun. It’ll just help our political enemies. I’d like to see what the Brady’s will say when Sumdood kills 9 people using a feather duster as a bludgeon while a Sig 229 sits unused in his IWB holster, 12 + 12 rounds of loaded magazines. Explain THAT, VPC! (Seriously, don’t go on a killing spree.))
  4. Speed Cameras that people over compensate for, slowing down to 30mph in a 55 zone to avoid a ticket. Wonderful. Those blood vessels in my eyes and brain need pressure testing and now I don’t have to worry about that.
  5. Mosquitos. Yeah, more of them. Add poison ivy to that category.
  6. Intoxicating beverages, fatty foods, and strumpets-for-money are cheap and plentiful.
  7. The job I do to make my money to feed, clothe, and shelter myself doesn’t involve stoop labor in a flooded paddy.
  8. I forget what 8 was for.
  9. Sporting events in this country have yet to truly discover the vuvuzela. (Actually I just like saying and typing vuvuzela.)
  10. My government isn’t too afraid of its citizens… but it is a LITTLE bit. Much better compared to many other nations.


Arthur said...

"I have to refrain from killing other people with my bear hands"

If that's some sort of genetic aberration you're sporting, I think I know why you sometimes have problems with your pistol shooting.

New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

Don't read TOO much into the joke-posts, Arthur